The Academy Bored
I wanted to wait a day before I wrote about the Academy Awards. I wanted to see if I felt any different about a silent film winning best picture and an actor who says two words the whole movie beats out the likes of George Clooney and Brad Pitt. I thought maybe if I gave myself some time, I would understand how a type of movie people quit making almost a century ago could beat contenders like The Help or Hugo. Well guess what – I don’t get it. It’s a freaking silent movie! There’s a reason people don’t make movies like this anymore because even a hundred years ago, people thought, ‘you know what would be nice, if we could hear what they’re saying.’ So technology advanced and silent films where a thing of the past until this year with The Artist.
I was hoping when Hugo started to snatch up awards early it would be the film to take down The Artist. Unfortunately for Hugo, the wins came in the technical categories early and the The Artist dominated late in the major categories. That’s right, a silent film in 2012 wins best picture, it’s director wins for making a movie no one else makes or cares about anymore, and Jean Dujardin wins best actor. A performance that’s full of a bunch of funny expressions and two words in French beats all the other performance this year. How do we know it was a good performance? It was silent! This isn’t like Holly Hunter winning for The Piano. She played a mute, but the movie and the performance was not silent. I guess if you dance around and make over-the-top faces, you will win an Oscar. Brad Pitt – take notes if you want one of those gold statues like your baby momma has.
People have told me, ‘You just don’t get it. This movie is like art. You don’t need the dialogue.’ If I wanted to be entertained by art like this, I would go watch mimes in the park (which I hate) or play charades (which I hate even more). With all the great movies they had to choose from, the Academy picks one with zero dialogue but plenty of over-the-top cheesy expressions, symbolism through colors, and people listening to nothing. This is the problem with the Academy. Sometimes they try to shove movies down our throats to show how they view movies on a higher level than you. The English Patient is the perfect example of this. A boring and terrible movie devoid of any entertainment that won best picture. I have yet to find someone who thinks that was a good movie. One of the best human stories of the year was 50/50 and that didn’t earn a nod in any of the categories. I used to think a great story, great acting, and throw cancer in the mix automatically earned you a trip to the Oscars. Maybe they should have left out the sound so they would have had a chance.
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